Gettin’ Riled Up Archive

When It Comes To Sex, You’re Doing Great!

When I started writing about sex one of my big motivations was my lifelong belief that I was doing it wrong. After a coupe of months of writing I realized

Heads up: because I’m taking on an inherently gendered phrase (porn for women), today’s post is a smorgasbord of gendered language and references assumptions that are frequently made along the

For four years, 2007-2011, I saw a therapist mostly weekly with some periods of monthly visits when she thought I was “doing better”. Something that became very clear to me

I resisted testing one of recent history’s most popular toys – The Womanizer– for a while. See, I’m a broad stimulation chick; when folks say things like “pinpoint” in relation

I had planned on writing about sex this week (you know, like a sex writer) but then my state was hit with a tragedy yesterday. Another shooter, another school, another round

Earlier this week, California Judge Donald Black ruled that abstinence-only education isn’t actually sex education (preach, sir!), provides inaccurate information and doesn’t meet California’s curriculum guidelines. So, this leaves one to

This week I received an email (I’m sure many of my colleagues received it too) from a large, well-known condom company offering me the “opportunity” to “collaborate” with them

This post is the result of Crista Anne and my endless conversations about what we love and hate about the conversations coming out regarding sexuality and depression. After the glorious

Hey folks, what would you think if I suddenly announced that a study (that I funded) had found that all sex blogs apart from mine cause computer viruses and I,

Have you ever seen the lists of possible side effects for anti-depressants? They are pretty long and, what I’ve always found interesting is that they are fairly detailed, naming very

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JoEllen Notte is a writer, speaker, and mental health advocate whose work explores the impact of depression on sex and relationships. Since 2012 she has written about sex, mental health, and how none of us are broken here at The Redhead Bedhead.

JoEllen has led workshops nationwide on sexual communication, navigating consent, having casual sex kindly, and dating as an introvert. She has toured sex shops, spoken at length on dildos, and even started a sex school but she is happiest and most effective when writing and speaking on behalf of quiet people who have sex. Check out her video series on attending conferences as an introvert and her extensive writing on sex and depression.

JoEllen has spoken at Clark College, University of Chicago, University of Tennessee, the Guelph Sexuality Conference, Woodhull’s Sexual Freedom Summit, and the Playground Conference

JoEllen’s first book The Monster Under the Bed: Sex, Depression & The Conversation We Aren’t Having was published by Thorntree Press in March 2020. Her new book In It Together: Navigating Depression with Partners, Friends, and Family was published by Thornapple Press in March 2023.

Gettin’ Riled Up Archive

When It Comes To Sex, You’re Doing Great!

Stop Calling These Things “Porn For Women” (Or Anyone)

All The Times I Should Have Left My Terrible Therapist

The Womanizer Doesn’t Work For Me (And It’s Important To Talk About That)

What Mentally Ill Looks Like

The Blind Leading the Blind- Is Abstinence Only Education To Blame For Parents Who Can’t Say “Penis”?

Won’t Work For Free (Or Condoms)

An Open Letter to Folks in the Sex & Depression Conversation

Condoms, Cancer & Scare Tactics – How One Company Is Using Fear to Sell

Taking on Sexual Side Effects with Kinkly.com